WoW 143: On emotional sobriety, resilience, and generosity

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Words of Wisdom 143 on emotional

resilience in relationships.

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Intensity in a relationship

is a sugar rush.

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It's short, fleeting, and unsatisfying.

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Intimacy is the meat and potatoes.

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Cultivate emotional resilience

to feast on deep connection.

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Conflict is the vegetables.

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The last thing you want,

but necessary to thrive.

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In order to improve your emotional

resilience, you must keep

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having vulnerable conversations.

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Two.

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To have a vulnerable conversation,

first identify something that

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is difficult to talk about.

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Then, share the topic, how you

feel, and the story you are

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attaching to your feelings.

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Here is a formula you can use.

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When X happened, I felt Y.

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The meaning I made was Z.

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3.

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Emotional sobriety means you stay grounded

and connected, feeling your emotions but

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not avoiding them or getting flooded.

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A drunk makes excuses so

they can keep on drinking.

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Don't be an emotional drunkard.

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Seek emotional sobriety.

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Choose the feeling you most commonly get

drunk on and surrender it to God, vowing

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to never again do so, and learn to rely

on God's power to keep you centered.

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If you don't commit to the narrow way,

to the goal of emotional sobriety,

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you'll certainly never get there.

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As it turns out, vulnerable conversations

are key to emotional sobriety.

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Four.

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Make a commitment today to

grow in emotional resilience.

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Invest in resilience, and it will

add up, having a compounding impact

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on your life and relationship.

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But it takes time.

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Refuse to take shortcuts.

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By cultivating emotional resilience,

you're not just improving your own

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emotional well being, but you're

also creating stronger, more

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fulfilling, and richer relationships.

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Prayer.

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Help me to be the boy with

five loaves and two fish.

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Help me to be a giver when I come

across need, to show up with all

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that I have, give what I can, and to

respond immediately to your guidance.

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Lead me in my next steps

and provide for me richly.

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Above all, may I feast

on your loving presence.

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I surrender everything

and everyone to you, Lord.

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Do with me and what you have

entrusted to me as you desire.

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Amen.

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Live wisely, Josh.